A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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