weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
