Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I just blew my weed a kiss
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize