He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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