Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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