what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
