the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize