No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
