stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Randomize
