U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
im about as happy as oj after his trial
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Found your dick twin last night
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
