it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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