I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
These tits shall not be calmed
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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