quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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