I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
my poor anus
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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