Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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