Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
