Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
