gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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