My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Even my vagina gasped.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
