Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize