Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize