What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize