I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
