Whod you bang
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
