we're blogging at a bar
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
