is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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