i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
