so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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