Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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