so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
