ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
