im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Everything about him screamed your future.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
