I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
