nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
