she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
