What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
