It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
my poor anus
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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