I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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