in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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