You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
