And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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