He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
