you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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