So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
lol hangovers are for mortals.
This toilet bowl is my home.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize