Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
