dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
