I'm really into asian looking animals
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
