i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Randomize
