You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize