Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize