Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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