i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
