I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize